Yes…at a quick glance, “uncomfortable” is the word that sums up my 2017. I mean I freakin turned 40, I lost my job and found myself unemployed for 3 months, I didn’t get the original role I interviewed for when I finally found employment, we have a toddler, a high school kid and a college kid and did I mention I turned 40?!? And I am trying to help others take control of their health…oh…and get this blog thing going.
So why uncomfortable?
Because to start, I had a hard time facing the fact that I turned 40 (if you haven’t figured that out yet and I will be 41 a month from tomorrow). Why did it bother me, because I came in believing that I had nothing to show for it, that I should be somewhere else in my life at this point, that I should be more “successful”, have a “bigger title” in my career, that I should be BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH! Yep, that was my first lesson this year! And then it hit me…”BITCH! You ARE 40 and SO WHAT!” First and foremost my 3 kids, hubby and I are healthy! I have a wonderful husband that puts up with my crazy and supports my ideas and indecisions. We have a beautiful home and though they may be few…I have quality friendships. Oh yeah, and I rocked out a 40th birthday photo session with the one and only Photos by Lulu!
Then, as previously mentioned in my blogs, I lost my job. I had NEVER been unemployed in 23 years! I had to take my son out of daycare, I couldn’t help my husband with our bills, I sent out resumes and completed endless applications and NOTHING for 3 months! Despite my years of experience, I couldn’t get the roles I longed for…but God has a funny way of doing things and after finally becoming employed I realized that title was NOT everything and that the title should not determine the quality of my work or the effort I put into everything I do. I can make a difference no matter the title on my business card…
And yes, our 3 kids are our hearts…and are represented in every gray hair that has entered and reentered my scalp this year, but I wouldn’t change a thing…ok, I’m lying I might change one or two things, lol…but I would still keep all 3.
This year has taught me how to “grow and learn” in that uncomfortable space. It taught me that I can overcome hard times, that when I put my heart in it I can do hard things, it taught me to overcome self doubt and just put myself out there (as I do in my blogs), it’s taught me to own my faults (but yes hubby, I am still learning to master this one) and it’s taught me to believe in myself even when the results are not immediate and take time.
This year I freakin turned 40, started a new blog, started my new IG and Facebook page for my fitness journey, started a new job, kept all 3 of my kids alive and well, celebrated another wedding anniversary and started to believe in me. Yes many uncomfortable moments and maybe in the scheme of things, it doesn’t look like much success but I do believe that 2017 has set me up to KICK ASS in 2018. So if you had too many IF ONLY…THEN moments in 2017….recognize it, let it go and let’s get this 2018 PARTY STARTED!!!! It’s either “one day or DAY ONE!” What will you choose?